What I am Loving Wednesday//Lady of the House Day

Happy Wednesday!

As this blog grows and morphs, it is our vision to incorporate different series – some very specific and short term, others more general and long term.

This post is kicking off one of those series and we are calling it…..DRUM ROLL PLEASE….What I am Loving Wednesdays! The whole point of the series is to highlight things we are enjoying. From the serious to the lighthearted, from fun to more heavy, you can expect a variety of things shared here. Think ideas, recipes, podcasts, books, blogs, people, sermons, etc. The possibilities are endless and we are excited to share the things that get us fired up.

So, what am I loving on this Wednesday?!

Saturdays, aka, LADY OF THE HOUSE DAY!

What is a Lady of the House Day (aka LHD)? Well, I am so glad you asked!

While I wish I could take credit for this amazingly beautiful and simple concept, I cannot. I stumbled across the idea/reminder on the Instagram account of Jess Connolly. She shared on her stories how she has reclaimed Saturdays as her own LHD… which is the day she does the housework, the errands, the mundane, and often not-so-fun tasks that pile up around the home.

She gave it the name for several reasons. One, the name is fun and lighthearted and gives off a fancy vibe. Two, and more importantly, giving it an extravagant name reframes the work for her and how she responds to the work. Instead of being something she has to do, it is something that she gets to do as the Lady of her House. The mundane becomes worship. The laundry becomes service. The errands become provision. All of the work becomes a way to give life – the clean and structure and means necessary for her family to thrive.

…and that right there? That is a privilege. 

I don’t know about you, but I KNOW I need more of that mindset. I’ve been claiming my Saturdays as Lady of the House Day now for awhile and you know what?

It changes things. It changes me. No work is wasted. Everything is done for His glory. Even folding socks and buying groceries.

It is ALL worship. 

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Book Review: “Mom Set Free” Bible Study

My current stage of life is what I call “the nap trap”: baby sleeps in the morning and baby sleeps in the afternoon. There’s a short window in between during which we pick up big brother from school and MAYBE hit the grocery store. That being said, I recently went about two months without making it to church because I was home with the sleeping baby. And the ability to attend a group bible study is out of the question right now, too. So. To LifeWay I went to find a study that I could do on my own that doesn’t really require a video component. No time for that!

If you’ve ever looked through the women’s bible study section, it’s rather overwhelming. But, God is good and He sent me home with “Mom Set Free” by Jeannie Cunnion. I hesitated because the subtitle reads “good news for moms who are tired of trying to be good enough.” I don’t struggle with comparison and “keeping up with the Jones’s” any more, so I didn’t know if this study would be applicable to my life.

Indeed it was! If you’re early in your parenting years, there is SO MUCH to learn from this study. If you’re more seasoned, I think you will find freedom from any guilt you may carry over past parenting decisions. And if you’re really seasoned in parenting AND grandparenting, perhaps you can disciple a young woman by working through this study with her.

Cunnion starts by helping you identify pressures in your life, particularly the belief that God is relying on us to be enough for our kids, as this is the source of most of our stressors. She reminds us that “our children don’t need us to be the perfection of Christ. They need to see us in pursuit of Christ” (p.27). With the idea of being “broken together,” she encourages readers to confess our weaknesses and be honest with ourselves and our children, not to highlight our failures but to invite the freedom it brings.

A theme streaming through the study is our powerlessness. While our instinct is to control the day, fix the problem, transform a child’s heart, its the Holy Spirit at work within our children that will produce the fruit we’re striving for. We have incredible impact and influence, but being reminded that we are powerless can help release some of the pressures we face. In the end, we don’t want rule-followers, but God-lovers.

Cunnion also helps you identify areas the enemy might be at work: when he flaunts our weaknesses front and center, when he breeds thoughts of comparison to make us give up altogether, when he tries to diminish the magnitude of our sins. She guides in practical ways so we can parent “from purpose rather than pressure” (p.55). I don’t know about you, but when I feel pressured I overreact, I’m unreasonable, and I’m inflexible.

So that’s when we’re pointed to grace. Lots and lots of emphasis on grace. Cunnion walks through a bounty of Scripture to deepen our understanding and receipt of God’s grace, because “we can’t give what we haven’t received” (p.61). Only when we feed ourselves the truths of the gospel can they become central in our homes as they overflow from our hearts.

With receipt of God’s grace Cunnion encourages readers to discipline and interact out of love, stating that “the most sacred space to demonstrate God’s love is in our children’s failures” (p. 118). As Paul urges in Ephesians 4, being humble, gentle, patient, and bearing with one another. When we demonstrate this kind of love, this is when we will have the most influence.

Without revealing the entirety of the study, I will mention the very practical tactics she offers to consider implementing in our own homes.

• Ways to plant seeds of faith in our kids’ hearts through prayer and studying God’s word
• What, Why, How, and Now: grace-filled discipline that’s for our children’s good, being both corrective and instructional
• Three ways to turn from our anger when responding to our kids
• Remember, Rely, and Recognize: ways to nurture gratitude in our children’s hearts

Feeling equipped and encouraged, I will place this book on a table nearby, not on a storage shelf. I know too well that I’ll need the reminder that I’m not letting my kids down and I’m not letting God down when things don’t go as planned. I’ll need the reminder that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28 NIV).

 

 

 

 

Rhythms of Rest + Responsibilities.

I have tried to write this post on several different occasions now and I just can’t seem to string the words together. Some of it has to do with my own distractions and the frequent indulgence in said distractions.

However, I think my hesitation and struggle goes deeper than just that. I think the real reason I am struggling to write is that this is something I am currently walking through. Wresting with. Learning from. Winning some, failing more.

Lately, I have been failing way more than winning which is why I think it is hard for me to write about this stage of life. By no means do I have this all figured out. If it comes out clumsy or not entirely clear, that is why.

So, what has got this lady all bent out of shape?

Rhythms. Routines. Responsibilities. Rest.

The intersection of these opposites. Relaxing and responsibilities. The balance of work and play. What the two mean in a spiritual and faith context. Why I should even care in the first place.

This is where I currently find myself. Struggling big time to figure out how to properly work and rest and show the world that it can be done, it should be done, and it is even possible in the first place. In today’s culture of extremes (busy workaholics and indulgent self-care obsessions), what should a gal of faith be doing?

With that being said, I am just going to go ahead and get my big, fat elephant out of the way.

I absolutely stink at this.

I am a wife and a mom of two boys. I work full-time outside of the home. My husband works two jobs to make sure we have what we need so most of the needs of managing a home falls in my lap… and I am fantastic at residing in the extremes of work and rest and am awful at living out the healthy, God-directed rhythm of work and rest.  I STINK at managing a home. I just can’t seem to make it work. I STINK at respecting the depth of what rest should look like. I STINK at the balance of life-giving rhythms…I even stink at trying to establish a rhythm in the first place.

While it is really easy and very tempting to just “let myself off the hook” and use the excuse that I am doing the best that I can, the truth is, most times I am not doing the best I can. And right now, I KNOW I can be doing better. It is not like I can’t do what I need to do. I have the skills. I know how to clean, how to fold laundry. I know I should make time for a Sabbath and rest…

It is just that I don’t want to out the work into establishing the rhythms and accountability to live it out in a healthy, God-honoring way. Working outside of the home, coming home and wrangling my two boys alone can be draining to say the least.

So…what does God have to say about this? Why does this matter to us from a biblical perspective?

To answer that question, we need not look further than the first book of the Bible, Genesis. The creation story. The one many of us were taught in our Sunday school days.

To sum up an incredible story simply, God created the entire universe in 6 days and on the 7^th day, He rested. BOOM. Right there is a gigantic cue from the Creator of the universe that our rhythms of work and rest matter. Want to see for yourself? Check out Genesis 1-2.

The theme of work and rest does not end there. Oh, no. It continues throughout the Bible. I’ve included a quick snapshot of what I am talking about.

On work…

Exodus 20:8-10/Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy.  Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns.

Psalm 127:2/ In vain you rise early and stay up late toiling for food to eat – for he grants sleep to those he loves.

Colossians 3:23/ Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters.

On rest…

Genesis 2:2-3/ By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.

Psalms 23:1-3/ The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul.

Matthew 11:28/ Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

These are just a few verses throughout the Old Testament and New Testament that address work and rest. With that, here are a few things I’ve come to learn and am working out in my day-to-day.

On work…

• Work is important. Hard work, it honors Him. Everything I do has a greater purpose. It is never just cleaning my house for my family or completing a project for my boss. It is holy work, an opportunity to honor God.
• There is a time and a place for it. Work is good. Working non-stop is not. Having a routine for hard and dedicated work needs to be a priority in my life.
• I am better when I work. Everyone around me seems to be better off when I put a high priority of working hard and working well (and holding myself accountable). I am kinder when I am not stressed by the mess of my house. I am more patient. There is more space for the good stuff of life – walks with my kids, crafts, exercising, etc…simply being able to be present because the demands of undone work aren’t screaming at me. Which leads to the other part of this teeter totter, rest.

On rest…

• Taking time to rest is important and I need to make time for it. If the Creator of the entire universe had time to rest, then I certainly do too. I need to follow His lead and put rest into my rhythms. It is for my betterment that I observe a Sabbath, that I get a break from the work.
• Just like work, too much rest is harmful too. I run the risk of being lazy and sinful if rest is constantly high on my priority list and there is unfinished work around (check out Proverbs! That book says a lot about laziness!).
• How I rest matters just as much as if I rest in the first place. Where do I go for rest? A mani/pedi? A Netflix binge? Too much _______ (fill in the blank with whatever the vice of the day is)? I love how Matthew 11:28 says “Come to ME”. It does not say run to your couch and go into zombie mode consuming whatever show you are currently into. It does not say run to Target and buy a ton of stuff don’t need. It says COME.TO. ME. True rest is in Him, spending time in his presence. It isn’t taking a night off to yourself. It is a lifestyle, a rhythm. It is so much more…and yet, so simple too. True rest takes intentionality, not just resting because you are burned out and crashing into a checked-out heap of tired.

Rest and responsibilities. Responsibilities and rest. Repeat. Let’s show the world there is a better way. A way where the yoke is easy and the burden is light (Matthew 28:30). A way where you can work and rest, rest and work without the burn out. A way where the work and rest are always holy. A better way.

How a Dress Can Change the World.

A dress can change the world.

It’s not about the dress… it is something SO much bigger than a dress.

It is about a world without slavery.

Because the numbers, the need, the people, and their stories simply cannot be ignored.

40 million are in slavery across the globe, more than any other time in history.

Human trafficking is a 150-billion-dollar industry, becoming the most profitable criminal industry in the world.

About 2 million children are exploited in the global sex trade.

A few weeks ago, we kicked off this blog with our mission of Micah 6:8//act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.

While it is our intent for this space to be a place to learn and share about what God has done and what we are learning as women in the Faith E community, it is our hope that this can also be a place to share the practical.

>>>Opportunities, missions, and organizations that we can partner with, support, and join to be the hands and feet in both our local and global communities.

This post is the first of that mission of the blog.

Say hello to Dressember, an organization centered on a dress…that is so much more than just a dress.

Founded officially in 2013 as an international movement, Dressember finds its humble roots in Blythe Hill (Dressember founder). In 2003, Blythe saw the struggles in the world and felt called to do something, but being that she is not a doctor, social worker, or lawyer, she struggled to find her place to contribute as a professional working in the fashion and blogging industry.

Fast forward to 2009. To take a stand and draw awareness to human slavery in the world, Blythe wore a dress every single day in the month of December…hence the name Dressember!

 Her movement caught on to her friends…and then the world.

How? How does Dressember fight against slavery across the globe?

People like you. People like me. Wearing dresses.

Dressember fights by fundraising, through people like you, to provide grants to 12 different organizations who seek to provide relief, restoration, and resources to victims. In less than 5 years, Dressember has raised over $5 million dollars to contribute to the fight and has collaborated with organizations like the International Justice Mission and A21.

This is where YOU come in.

We have the very cool opportunity to raise awareness and funds by becoming Dressember advocates. Here is how it works.

1. Sign up as a Dressember advocate on the Dressember’s website (https://dressember-2018.funraise.org/fundraiser/signup) and join the Faith E Women’s team (Faith E Micah 6:8 Gals).
2. Raise $$$! Tell your friends and family about Dressember and its mission. Educate yourself and others about the need.
3. Wear a dress every single day of December with other advocates across the globe…not a gal? Men can join the efforts too! Join the team and wear a tie every day as a part of the Dressember movement.

Learn more about Dressember and other ways you can get involved here: https://www.dressember.org/.

Please join us as we strive to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly. We are honored to get to do this with you!

It’s a Giveaway!

Our winners are Heather Petty, Mary Johnson, and Cheri Knuth!  Your copy of 100 Days to Brave is waiting at Faith E!

 

We’re excited about getting the blog underway and we can’t wait to have Annie F. Downs in Billings next month …. so let’s give away 3 copies of 100 Days to Brave!  All you have to do is like and share this post on Facebook or leave us a comment letting us know what topics you’d like us to address.  We’d love to hear from you!  We’ll have a random drawing on Monday for three winners.

Micah 6:8//Walk Humbly

He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the LORD require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God.  ~ Micah 6:8

Walk Humbly …

These words have been rolling around in my mind for a week or more and I continue to circle around to the idea that walking humbly requires some type of action on my part.  I have to be willing to engage, to lean in, to move when it’s time and to wait when I would rather charge ahead. Thankfully, we aren’t called into action alone. We are called into action with our God.    Let that sink in … the Most High God wants us to walk with Him. He wants you and me to move day in and day out through life with Him.  What a privilege!

And yet, the magnitude of that can seem overwhelming.  Walking in relationship with the Creator of the universe … sometimes it’s too much for my mind to grasp.  Which is where the humble part comes in. A right perspective of who I am before a Holy God is key. In order to walk humbly, I must be willing to look at myself in relation to His holiness.  Alone, I fall short of the mark every single time.

Bottom line – I am a sinner who needs a savior.  He is Holy and worthy of my praise. I need God’s grace daily and He mercifully provided a way.  Through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, I can position myself under God’s authority.  As I walk in the day to day routines of life, the Holy Spirit continues His sanctifying work in me.   When I allow the Holy Spirit to direct my steps, there’s a freedom to move about with confidence … to seek justice and to love mercy.

All this is true – I know it to be true – I’ve experienced it in my life many times.   Yet decades (yes, gulp, it’s been decades of learning) into this requirement to walk humbly, I still question what that really looks like in my everyday life.  Practically speaking, how then do we get in a rhythm of walking humbly with God?

• Pray.  Take time to sit with Him in prayer before the action of our day begins.  The sweet aroma of communion with God in prayer helps me remember what’s important.    Take a deep breath, be quiet and listen for the Shepherd’s voice.
• Study His Word.  Searching the Scriptures for glimpses of the Father’s character is the best way I know to keep a humble perspective.   One way or the other, His Word almost always leaves me in awe of His goodness, love, faithfulness, grace, mercy, power … and on and on the list goes.   
• Allow for Margin.This is a big one in my life right now.  I’m being reminded that I must keep my time fluid enough to engage with the very people God’s placed around me.  If I’m not careful, I can over-schedule every minute of my day and then I’m not really walking with God at all.  I’m doing a lot of things … even things for His Kingdom … but accomplished tasks without a humble heart are really just a checkmark at the end of the day.  I don’t want a life of checkmarks … I want a life marked by His grace and love extended to those around me.
• Repent. I realize this isn’t a popular idea, but true humility cannot come from an unrepentant heart.  When God graciously shows me where I’ve behaved poorly or my thoughts go sideways or my attitude is a mess, humility requires that I come into agreement with His ways.  
• Believe Him.  God wants us to believe Him – especially in terms of who He says we are.  We are His chosen people, holy and dearly loved. He doesn’t want us to strive for humility but somehow twist that into thinking we are unloved.   You and I are his beloved children.

My final thought is that perhaps walking humbly with our God is meant to be a beautiful mystery in some ways.  It’s an area of our Christian life that we are never to fully grasp because it’s meant to be a lifelong journey on this side of heaven.   May we learn to walk worthy!

 

Micah 6:8//Love Mercy

As we take a look at mercy, let’s look at what exactly the Lord is requiring of us. As we do this, I think we’ll find ourselves both challenged to make some changes, and overwhelmed as we grasp how deep His love is for us.

Mercy is defined as “compassion or forbearance shown especially to an offender”. You and I. We’re the offenders, the sinners, the broken. And God? He’s the Savior: full of mercy, forgiveness, love. You and I? We deserve punishment and penalty. God? He gives us what we don’t deserve: compassion, understanding, loyalty. It started in the garden! And He hasn’t changed yet.

“Who is a God like you,
who pardons sin and forgives the transgression
of the remnant of his inheritance?
You do not stay angry forever
but delight to show mercy.” Micah 7:18

“But delight to show mercy.” Here we start to uncover how we’re being told to “love mercy.” We aren’t just told to be merciful, but to have an eagerness to show mercy. And please don’t disregard that here we’re not just being asked to love mercy, we’re being told to love mercy. How’s that for a challenge? I struggle to even find the extra patience and kindness for someone when I’m feeling offended, let alone look forward to giving that love!

“You will again have compassion on us;
     you will tread our sins underfoot
     and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.
You will be faithful to Jacob,
    and show love to Abraham,
you pledged on oath to our ancestors
    in days long ago.” Micah 7:19-20

Repeated compassion, dismissal of sins, faithfulness, love, loyalty. I’m really, really, challenged here, ladies. If you’re a mother, you too have felt repeatedly offended. (“How many times have I told you not to wear muddy shoes in the house?!”) If you’re a wife, you, too. (“Why can’t you remember what I told you?!”) If you’re a woman of any sort, you’ve felt repeated offenses as well. (“But I wanted that parking spot!” or “I asked for no mayo on my sandwich.”)

Okay, so these offenses are small, but maybe they are our starting place for loving mercy. When we can display a sincere eagerness to demonstrate God’s grace on the “simple stuff,” then we can move on to loving mercy towards the complicated stuff.

Like when your spouse cheats on you. Or your best friend gossips about you. Or your child lies about smoking. Or your mother forgets to show up. Or your coworker takes credit for your effort. These are the scenarios where God needs our first thought to be reconciliation, not retaliation.

“But in your great mercy you did not put an end to them or abandon them,
      for you are a gracious and merciful God.” Nehemiah 9:31

To reconcile does not mean that things go without consequences. Remember earlier, the call to act justly? Just because we seek to offer forgiveness does not mean there are never ramifications for the offender. We all know God disciplines the ones He loves.

So as we look at our opportunities to love mercy, may we remember God’s unfailing love for us and use that as the lens in which we view our confrontations. It won’t be easy, but I’ll encourage you if you encourage me : )

Micah 6:8//Seek Justice.

Micah 6:8 – He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God (NIV).

Micah 6:8. A verse we’ve heard countless times. Sang in songs. Maybe even claimed as our life verse.

Micah 6:8. A simple verse. And a verse that carries some serious weight and responsibility.

This year, Micah 6:8 is going to be the theme for our Women’s Ministry at Faith E. With our new adventure in the blog world, it only made sense to start with an exploration of this verse and its application. With a humbled heart, here we go…

There are three commands with Micah 6:8, each of which we will explore here on the blog. So, that leaves us at the starting place…Justice.

To act justly. To seek justice.

To be honest, this isn’t the post I wanted to start with. Not because I don’t wholeheartedly believe in it or think it’s a terrible place to start, but because of the weighty obligation of seeking justice…and what that means for me in my day to day life.

Younger Kelly, more optimistic and idealistic and free-from-major-life-responsibilities Kelly LOVED this verse (I still do!). I always thought I would be one of those actively pursuing justice – working hard to be in His hands and feet, working overseas, seeing the least of these get their justice.

….And then “real” life set in. I graduated college, got married and was saddled with student loans. I settled down. Got a big girl job. Had babies. Lost sight of justice in the middle of daycare runs and bills to pay, messes to clean and a marriage to sustain.

Where did justice go? Where did that passion for justice of younger Kelly go?

How can I actively pursue justice when I am in the thick of working motherhood?

How can any of us seek justice when we aren’t in courtroom, in the trenches or overseas? What can we do in the day to day?

What does justice look like in the everyday mundane?

Before exploring the answers to those questions, I think it’s important to understand what justice really means.

Justice/ˈjəstəs/noun: just behavior or treatment. Quality of being fair and reasonable. A concern for peace and genuine respect for people.

Okay, cool. Thanks, Webster’s Dictionary.

Another perspective to consider that I find incredibly powerful is from Thomas Aquinas. According to Aquinas, at the heart of justice is a relationship.

Two people…with goods and/or services that at least one of them needs thrown in the mix.

Justice, then, becomes whether or not the person who has the goods and services is related to the person in need in such a way that the beholder could/ought fill the need. Following me?

To put it simply, Aquinas says if there is someone in need and there is someone who has the means to fill it, justice demands it’s filled.

Great. Simple enough. See a need, fill the need.

However, what makes seeking justice so hard for me is that I don’t always follow through with filling the need.

I am not so great at even seeing the need in the first place.

It becomes all too easy for me to adequate justice with simply having rights and righting wrongs, whether that is through the legal system or by some other means…Leaving the hard work of justice to those who are in the trenches. Those overseas. Those on the steps in D.C. The needs are too big, my abilities and resources too small…so somehow, that “lets me off the hook”.

My warped perspective (unintentionally) becomes all or nothing. Either I am doing the big justice thing or not. It becomes what they do and what I admire from afar.

What this mindset fails to remember is GOD MOVES REGARDLESS. Regardless if it is big or small. Regardless if it is actively saving those who have been trafficked or financially supporting from afar. Regardless if it is using my voice in a courtroom to defend or using my voice to educate those around me. It doesn’t matter. God moves regardless.

GOD MOVES. He wants my obedience…and He does the rest.

So, what does this look like? What does pursuing justice look like when I have a full-time job and babies to raise?

While this is by no means an exhaustive list, here are some things to consider, things I am currently and imperfectly putting into practice.

• Pray, pray, pray – for those who are doing the “big” acts of justice. For their safety, for His will to be done. For open eyes to see the injustices around me that I can do something about. For the strength to obey when called. For the whole world to get justice and peace.
• Vote – Learn about initiatives and support candidates who are working towards justice. Use my voice to uplift, rather than condemn.
• Consider how I spend my money – Shop fair trade…or not shop at all. Become educated on issues like fair trade, sustainability, and fast fashion. Always remember my dollar reveals my heart.
• Think globally – Justice isn’t just a person issue. It’s an environmental one too. How am I stewarding my resources and place on this earth to sustain and protect its God-breathed beauty in a way that others can continue enjoy it? Maybe this means composting, recycling, or simply using less. Maybe it means using that refillable water bottle and remembering our resources are limited and fighting to protect them.
• Get proximate – Get closer to situations where injustices reign. Learn about the issues. Get uncomfortable. Befriend and love. It’s hard to ignore issues when they are your neighbor, when injustice’s cruelness is staring you down in the face.

Justice. Never easy. Always worth it. To serve a need is to serve Christ.

I don’t know about you, dear friends, but seeking justice is something I can no longer ignore.

My faith demands it. The world craves it. He longs to see me play my part in it.

Before I go, one final thought to consider. While I don’t want to steal too much thunder from a blog post to come, I have to point out that Micah 6:8 didn’t start and end with seeking justice and loving mercy. There’s a final command. The most fundamental and central to the other two.

Walk humbly with your God.

Want to seek justice? Walk humbly with your God.

Because when you are walking humbly with Him, you start to see the world with His eyes, His heart. When you are walking humbly with Him, you are dethroned off the central throne of your life and you start thinking of yourself less. When you are walking humbly with Him, He puts you in situations where you can be His hands, His feet, His heart. When you are walking humbly with Him, you can be justice.

Seek justice. Love mercy. Walk humbly.

Humbly learning with you as I go,

Kelly